The Longest Week

One week from today we have our anatomy scan for baby #2.  I do not remember the anticipation being this bad with my son. This pregnancy feels very similar to my last one or better. The second trimester is wonderful since, for the most part, the morning sickness has passed and my appetite is back to normal.  I have gained 1 pound so far and I am at 19 weeks.  I have had dreams about having a second boy but they could just be my brain remembering the last pregnancy and since having a boy is all I know.  My son refers to the baby as his little brother.  So the wait continues.  Next week I get to fill this box with pink or blue balloons for my son to open.  Either way, we are excited to see our little one and hope they are growing big and strong.

Sister or Brother? Time will tell...

I realized that since I had to keep this pregnancy a secret for so long I was in some kind of denial or non-acceptance.  Part of that meant not taking any pictures of my bump.  With my first son, I kept a pregnancy journal documenting each week and all the changes.  This time I have done nothing. Is this normal? Is this what its like to be the second child?  From here on out, I promise to embrace this experience as I did before.  To take pictures, eat better (or try), sing and dance and smile!

19 weeks

All Parents Have Hard Times

I am sure that even the world's best mother and father have those days when everything bugs them, everything seems hard and things just don't go their way.  I am by no means discounting the difficulty every parent has at some point BUT sometimes I feel like I have it harder.  Trust me, I know that sounds bad.

There are lots of good days.  Jackson wakes up between 530 and 7 (on the weekends) usually.  Sometimes I can get out of bed, pick him up, change him, feed him and then play without too much pain.  It is usually pain I can overcome. 

There are some bad days.  Days when I hear him crying and it takes me a while to get out of bed, then I have to take a hot bath or shower to loosen up my joints.  Then I can shuffle to his room and hoist him out of the crib.  He will cry and fuss the whole time I am changing him.  I struggle down the steps to feed him and play (which is him playing and me laying on the couch).

I know lots of parents have these days too and I pray theirs are spread out farther than mine are.  You probably are thinking...where is your husband?  Have him do some of this.  He does a lot.  He has to work so early sometimes he cannot help.  But his definately pulls his share at night.  Doesn't Lupus go into remission?  Do all Lupies have these problems with infants.  I should mention that even though Jackson is just under 10 months, he is HUGE!  He weighs almost 25 pounds and he is practically walking.  He is so big I have to take 2 trips into daycare, one with just him then one with his stuff.

Today's Blessing:  Spending time with my boys at our community snow day. 

Dedicated to My Brother

The other night I posted and I completely forgot to mention the awesome time we had last weekend when my younger brother and his girlfriend came to visit us.  It is hard for me to remember what I want to say when I write these but be assured my brother called me out on it the following day.  They were here for a long weekend to help out and visit Jackson. 

We went downtown San Antonio to the Riverwalk and Alamo.  I am so glad I was able to take Jackson before we move and we got a cute picture in front of the Alamo.  Of course, Jackson didn't seem to be interested in anything but watching the ducks and pigeons.  We drove out to the "Cowboy Capital" Bandera and watched horses on main street.  We went shopping and rented movies.  We went to yummy restaurants and watched the Ravens beat New England.  It was wonderful and I miss them being here to help out.

Special Visitors

Jackson's First Alamo Visit

Playing with Uncle Rob

They were also life savers because they flew my cat back to Maryland.  It is heart breaking to have to give up a pet not because you want to but need to for medical reasons.  I am so thankful he is in a place where he is loved and cared for.  Thanks Mom!

Today's Blessing:  I had a strawberry margarita and it was awesome!


Doc's Last Day in Texas



Almost Done Shopping

So this weekend we went nuts and spent too much money especially since we need to save for a down payment on our new house we will be purchasing in the next few months.  BUT we are almost done Christmas shopping.  We only need gifts for our secret Santa's and we are done!  It is a small Christmas but it made me really think and get creative. 

For a few years Christmas was getting kind of boring.  Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed spending time with family and friends but it was a lot of gifts and not enough fun.  This year we have been celebrating for one week so far and it has been so much fun.  Jackson makes everything better.  I am very excited to take him to see Santa.  Maybe next weekend.  We were in Target today and saw an old man wearing a Santa hat with a real white beard (probably a Santa on the side).  Jackson just looked at him and kept playing with his toy.  SO, maybe this is an indication that he will not cry when on Santa's lap.  Crossing my fingers.

Decorating is all done.  I didn't do much this year.  We bought a new pre-lit tree since our old tree took so long to put lights on and my wrists hurt too much to mess with that.  I hope I can find someone who wants it, it is a really nice tree.  This new tree is a little Charlie Brownish but its temporary.  When we know what our new house looks like next year we can get one that fits better.  The wreath is on the door and the stockings are on the mantel and that's all she wrote.

Focusing on the Golf Balls

 

I must be depressing to my husband.  He sent me the below link that a friend of his had posted on Facebook.  I think I have heard something like this before but like most people you read it then move on and forget.  This time I read it with a different outlook on life and I definitely think I need to focus more on the golf balls.

The golf balls are the important things:  Our efforts for everlasting happiness, our spiritual, emotional, mental and physical health, our family, our partner, our children, our friends.  Things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, our life would still be full.

 

Here is a link to the story

So, for my husband (and myself), I am going to think of something everyday that I am thankful for and that makes me happy (and it won't always be my little man).

Today's Blessing:  No one ringing the doorbell after lights out on Halloween and not getting egged.

How I Found Out

This is my first post on my new blog.  I am testing it all out but wanted to start with my story with Lupus.  It sounded like a topic I knew I could share and have shared many times so this should be easy, right?

In August 2012, I was feeling tired.  I got a nice rash/hives on my head in my hairline.  Then it spread to my ears.  I thought it would go away but it didn't, it got worse.  I went to a med clinic here in San Antonio (yes, they are real doctors) and I was diagnosed with SHINGLES!!! Ewww, I felt dirty.  I was given meds to help with the itchy rash and they started to go away but then about a week later I started getting fever blisters on my bottom lip.  I had never had fever blisters before but I figured it makes sense since I had the shingles.  I made a trip back to the med clinic because I couldn't eat and the blisters were not going away.

In September 2012, the doctor at the med clinic gave me penicillin for the fever blisters and they went away BUT my whole body broke out in a itchy rash.  My arms and legs were so red and itchy and nothing would help.  I went back to the med clinic and was told I had a drug reaction to penicillin because I was allergic (I had never been allergic to anything in my life).  The doctor said it will go away on its own (took 2 weeks). 

I thought I was feeling better, just a little cold and ear ache but nothing I haven't dealt with before.  Work offered the flu shot and I got it like I do every year, WORST mistake and BEST blessing ever.  Most people get the shot and a sniffle and move on, I couldn't move on.  In fact, I am still fighting the flu.  Thanks to the flu shot I went back to the doctor one more time.  By then I was starting to get a nice little rash on my cheeks.  He said I needed to go to the dermatologist.

After a month or so of missing so much work, not being able to lift my baby because I was in so much pain I was off to the dermatologist (well the best PA I could find).  It is hard to be a new patient when you need to be seen right away, many places couldn't see me until FEB!  REALLY?  One look at me and she thought Lupus.  I guess it was more obvious than I thought.  She ordered lots of tests through blood work and urine.  I was given creams for my face which helped clear it up in a week. 
The PA called me on a Thurs to give me the results.  I had lupus and I needed to go to the rheumatologist soon. 

Here are two pictures I took of the rash:

This one is good so you can see I was healing.  The rash on my cheeks peeled off.  Man I was so swollen!

 

 Here is another of my swollen face.  I dont even know if this was the beginning or end of the rash!

 

So that's my story for now.  My wrist hurts from what I have typed before.  I think its the rain.